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2009 Archive 14: Sweating The Small Stuff

Stiletto Wheels Bird

The Caged Bird

Welcome to my annual health update – please, suck it up.  I need some record of how my illness is progressing – better here than in a huge filing cabinet … I have enough other junk in my house.

This year, life has been good … well, as good as it gets when you’re a neurological cripple, of uncertain prognosis and progression, with skin cancer.

OK, that’s so not good but, really, it’s all relative, trust me on this – or take a look at previous postings.  No hospital, no drugs – OK, not many drugs and no IV drugs.  In over twelve years, this has only happened one other year – 1999/2000.  I should end now, right, on the good news?

Hah!  You know me, it’s never that simple and sometimes, you just gotta sweat the small stuff …

With said ‘small stuff’, I’ve been so sick and I am totally fed up with it.  Christmas Day and Boxing Day were OK but, on the day after, I got a tickle in my throat.  Something viral and it’s been horrendous.  Housebound for two whole weeks.

I welcomed in the New Year vomiting wildly – and I do mean projectile vomiting … violently, from 2am to 8am.  It was dire.  I had hoped to, you know, have fun over the holiday period but nada, nix, nothing!  We even had to cancel our Helene Darroze lunch for New Years Day.  How irritating is that?

Hello, 2010.  Really looking and feeling good!

Then, as I was thinking that I was a bit better, we ventured out to a local restaurant. I caught a secondary virus and got ill again plus, as if life could get any worse, EaZyD got sick.

Wouldn’t you know, EaZyD got sick on a Sunday, was pretty bad until the Tuesday but seemed to start getting better Wednesday and was back to work Thursday.  Whilst I am glad he was not sick for long (really, I am!), how fair is that?

He is sick for, like, 4 days and me for nearly 4 f**king weeks now!  Do I not have enough health crap to deal with?

Other than the one trip where I got sick again, I have not left the house for a month.  I am going crazy here but just need to get better and yet, even today, I am still coughing with a throat problem.

F**k, f**k, f**k, it’s just not fair.  May I, for once, wail: ‘Why me?’

OK, in my more Zen like moments, I know this is a mere sh*tty little blip of time in the context of my whole life … but, hey, another sh*tty blip?

Like I haven’t had a surfeit of those in the past 12 f**king years?  Just bring it on because I can cope with endless f**king sh*t and stuff … who better than me?  I should welcome the practice of finding ways to cope in this daily living hell that would appear to be my lot in life … and, you just gotta wonder why it is this way, no?

Perhaps there is some f**king messiah who knows all sh*t and I am serving payback for some former f**king life that I don’t even f**king remember so what is the f**king point of that?

Rant over, and, as it does, life is – only now, at the end of January – returning to some semblance of normality.  I have a bunch of friends at mine tonight to watch a DVD on Blek le Rat and, if any of them have a cold, they can f**k right off, I’m telling you!

[No, of course I didn’t really tell my friends to f**k off, not even those with colds.  I may be profane but I am not rude!  Many apologies for the profanity and I hope the ** helped ameliorate the effect.  This was just a piece that needed seriously profane language to express my mood!  I feel it to be quite reserved in that context … and, yes, I do feel better now.  Thank you for asking.]

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